Archive for the ‘Hot Plate’ Category

Won’t you be my neighbor?

January 19, 2009

Hot Plate‘s Mexican Omelette was again sending me messages. Who am I to ignore them? I just do what I’m told. Exhausted from my outing earlier in the week, I had my husband drive our team of horses. I was cozy warm because I stuffed hot potatoes in my pants. While I devoured my second Mexican Omelette of the week I chatted with owner, Carrie Lewis. She told me a tale. A tale that reminded me of how dark the human soul can be… a tale of the flawed nature of humanity. I openly wept as she told me the tale of her passive aggressive  neighbors. And as I sipped my 9th delicious latte, I formulated a plan: I would counter the negativity directed at The Best Restaurant on the South Side by channeling the Prince of Peace, Mr. Rogers. Who better to handle bad neighborhood joojoo than him? I can think of no one. I have created this card and will be making a plate asap. Reserve one (or five) today because they will be selling faster than Hot Plate’s pumpkin pancakes.

Hi neighbor!


May my suffering bring you joy

January 16, 2009

Only my fellow Minnesotans and residents of Chicken, Alaska can truly understand what it means to be cold. I am intrigued by deadly weather. Cold that can freeze a limb solid. Cold that flattens your car tires. Cold that makes your eyeballs feel funny.

I braved the extreme cold today.


-21° is COLD.

But a Mexican Omelette was whispering my name with such longing… It was whispering in a French dialect, so that was weird – but other than that it all seemed legit. I put on every bit of clothing I owned and headed outside. The car actually told me to F – Off. I reminded it that we were both in this together and that if it cooperated I would fill it up with Premium Gasoline. Foolish car, choosing gasoline over Mexican Omelette!

When I was safely inside of Hot Plate I laughed… Oh, how I laughed – and saluted the outdoors for being a worthy adversary.

Later that day (that SAME day) I went outside again. I actually ran to the studio. It took 1.5 seconds. Luckily my exposed body part (my bottom) was unharmed. See, I’m a bit of a daredevil and maybe most of you can’t understand what it means to throw caution to the wind. I can’t teach you. It’s either in your blood or not. IF your blood alcohol level is somewhere near 0.20% than you may also be able to throw caution to the wind. But that’s not natural and I don’t recommend it as a “lifestyle.”

Where was I? Oh, yes. I risked my limbs (and bottom) to run to the studio and lay out previously written cards. Three birthday cards. The metal type was awfully cold. I wanted to lick it but I exercised restraint.

In your own urineGet out of my room.

My tiny friends.